Cole's 10 Takes On 10 Horror Films

An American Werewolf In London

★★★

  Before Twilight’s CGI wolves, An American Werewolf In London was what you watched to witness a good werewolf flick. And I’m one of the few modern-day teenagers that have this opinion: it’s what I prefer. Now I know that any teenage girl, or fan of what’s “popular” will be appalled at my earlier statement; so I’ll explain why. An American Werewolf In London finds two American students who encounter a werewolf while touring Britain; one is killed; one is mauled. However, the local townspeople deny the werewolf’s existence, and instead cover it up. This classic horror movie gives you a feel for satisfying early 80’s horror movie production: a good script, some decent acting, moderate graphics, a flawed entertainment factor, a high dose of enjoyability, and the desire to watch it repetitively. But unfortunately, it all winds down to its highly abrupt ending that I was not at all prepared for. My DVD of An American Werewolf In London will hopefully make it through multiple generations to come; it’s a movie for the ages! And yes, it may not be as entertaining or mind-numbing as Twilight, but it sure is a whole heck of a lot better!

Jaws

★★★ ½

  “We’re gonna need a bigger boat...” uttered Roy Schneider in Jaws, one of America’s most successful and well known horror films about a giant, man-eating shark that infests a community’s beaches. Won Oscars for Best Editing, Best Sound, and Best Music. Now, I have seen quite a few movies. Actually, I’ve seen a whole bunch. By far, the most iconic music is Jaws’. DaNa. DaNa. DaNaDaNaDANADANADANA! Shark attack! Well if that doesn’t put a smile right on your face, I don’t know what will. But anyways, the reason it’s so great is because unlike modern “shark flicks”, it isn’t riddled with laughable acting and isn’t entirely stupid. Remember how they tried to make AVP based off of Alien and Predator? How’d that one turn out? And also, it’s a movie that gets better every time you watch it because it’s fascinating. What some may see as dull scenes, are all elements that build up to the climax, that are necessary for the better quality of the film. After all, it shouldn’t just be entertainment.

The Cabin In The Woods

★★ ½

  Okay, here’s the thing. I desperately wanted to love this movie. And I did for some time; but when it reached it’s climactic closure, I walked away rolling my eyes. Without giving too much away: it’s stupid. But, the rest of the movie’s pretty darn inventive! Creativity is evident here in a anti-horror film about friends who go to a “cabin in the woods” set up for a hidden element (until the end). When I say set up, I mean that it’s rigged. The whole time while we are seeing them in the house, fleeing from monsters, we are seeing the group of computer engineers set up the perfect horror-fest. It’s an obvious representation of dramatic irony! When the friends discover this, and break into the system, things only go downhill. It’s pretty enjoyable, and has got some great special effects, but the ending is too overdone and leaves me with an impression that is distasteful. However, because of it’s uniqueness, it tears at me to give it more than just a two-and-a-half star rating... So I’ll end on this note: The Cabin In The Woods is a really cool movie to watch that has too many ideas.

Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

★★

This isn’t a movie I expect to be on anybody’s “favorite list”. It’s just not lovable. It’s a good theater experience, but I won’t buy it on DVD. Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is a clever twist on Abraham Lincoln’s life during the Civil War. And as cool as it may sound, it really is redundant because there are so many shrug-your-shoulders vampire movies that Hollywood seems to just be churning out month after month. It would’ve been better about ten years ago. Or maybe this whole vampire cinema phase will blow over, and it will be rereleased in ten or twenty years. That’s what I’m hoping for.

Scream

★★★

As cheesy as it is, Scream is a guilty pleasure of mine. I don’t know if I’d consider it a classic horror flick, but it’s still pretty serviceable. Not to mention juicy! It’s dark; it’s intriguing; it’s scary. It possesses all of the qualities that make a good horror movie... Despite its less-than-stellar acting. One of its major assets is how you put yourself in the place of the main characters, and experience their fear as the unknown masked killer stalks them down, and kills them. When you reach the end, and you’re shaking, and on the edge of you’re seat, you’ll know what I mean when I say that Scream is a real scary movie.

Psycho

★★★ ½

  Psycho is the king-daddy of all horror movies. Hitchcock had his greatest success with this costly masterpiece, and those interested in learning more about the production (like myself at the time) should see Hitchcock, another great movie. This movie basically unfolds the guilt of Janet Leigh’s character after stealing a large amount of money from her business and fleeing, and her encounters with Norman Bates, the hotel owner of where she takes refuge in. It’s brilliantly shot, scripted, and adapted from  Robert Bloch’s mind-blowing novel... And is one of America’s finest films. Look closely at the set design and you’ll notice how Hitchcock added a cheap touch to the look of it to force the audience to look beyond what too many people seek out in a horror movie.

The Happening

★

You know what, this may not be a textbook horror film, but it may as well be a really bad one. Honestly, random suicides that lead to a completely nonsensical resolution? Give me a break. I’ve seen episodes of The Wiggles that are better written than this garbage. Sure, I was frightened a bit upon initial viewing. But hey, I was 11. And I even thought this movie was bad then! Not only that, but my favorite movie then was Deep Blue Sea. Now what does that say about The Happening? And also, there is a thing called a safety switch on a lawn mower that every single one in America has.

Rest Stop

★★

        A young woman and her boyfriend, fleeing from their home life, come across a rundown rest stop along their journey. And she needs to use the restroom. So she goes in, and comes back out... And her boyfriend is missing, along with the car they were in. Later on, an unknown man in a pickup truck begins terrorizing her. Rest Stop is genuinely scary for some time. Then it brings in preposterous elements that lessens the seriousness of the movie, and makes it seem like your average predictable horror movie. It then adds some disturbing, and even more frightening closer looks at the predator, I should say. All in all, it’s a pretty scary movie that needs several of its plot elements to be reconsidered.

The Shining

★★★ ½

Heeeeerrreeee’s Kubrick’s first horror movie that contains not only a man’s journey to complete insanity, but also contains some supernatural elements. But I personally focused on, and enjoyed, Jack Nicholson’s exceptional portrayal of the hotel caretaker who starts to go insane due to cabin fever, and his rise to insanity above all else in the movie. His performance was completely and entirely terrifying. The movie didn’t leave us guessing as to why he began to go crazy; it showed us. It left out nothing, and delivered all of the juicy scenes that could very well have been left out (luckily they aren’t). And not to mention how eery the feeling of the whole thing actually is! The Shining is a brilliant film. Look closer at it, and you’ll like it even more.


-All Reviews Written by Cole Pollyea